Monday, July 14, 2014

How Did I Get Here?

Have you ever wondered how you got here? Not how you were born, but how you got to the place you are now in life.

Why you think the way you do? Why you see the world the way you do? And why other people don’t see it the same way? 

Why you know exactly how a thing ought to be done, but you can’t get a family member to do it that way? Why your values are different than your friends and maybe even your children’s? Why you believe in God or not, and what feelings that word brings up in you?

Your Belief Soup

soupIt may seem like common sense, but most of us don’t realize that each one of us grew up in a different soup of beliefs, teachers, circumstances, parents, birth order, expectations, and so on. All of that shaped who we are. And sometimes life moves too fast to examine some of the things that we assume to be true.

Don’t Believe Everything You Think

temporary-thoughtMost of our life is lives from the unconscious level. This is a great thing because we don't need to constantly remember to breathe, we don't need to consult a map every time we go to work or drive home. But it's not so helpful when we continue to run the software installed in our subconscious that no longer serves us, or that never did. Some parents, doing the best they knew at the time, withheld praise or even actively ridiculed their children in order to get them to do better. But research shows that until we are about 7 years old, we are little tape recorders, and unable to discern or process information in the way they had hoped. That's why you may find with surprise that you talk or walk or make a hand gesture just like one of your parents. It's in the subconscious.

Religious Beliefs


My mother was brought up in a strict religious family. She gave us the gift of not sending us to church because her upbringing was so strict. So I grew up only knowing what the popular culture told me about Christianity or any religion. And I got to form my own ideas about spirituality. And I'm really glad about that. I came to spirituality without the dogma of organized religion, without the messages that God is wrathful or punishing, and without feelings of unworthiness that seem so prevalent. Some got through, but in all, they did a really good job of editing out most of the less-than-useful patterns of their upbringing.

A Suggested Solution

So why not reprogram your subconscious to clean out those feelings of less-than, not-enough, can't-get-what-I-want, and so on? If it sounds right, try this:

sleeping-catGet out your smart phone, and record, in your own voice, affirming thoughts and self-praise. Any messages that you think would be helpful for you. Affirmations that you believe, but haven't quite seemed to stick so far because your subconscious thoughts keep over-riding them.

If you're a technical whiz, add some soothing music underneath.

Now, listen to it as you sleep. Try it for a night or a month. And let me know how it goes.

How About You?

Do you have special tricks for overcoming subconscious beliefs?